In coaching people on how to work well with others I often have to remind people that “bonding “and connecting with other people is so important in building trust and relationships. I am personally wired to get right down to business. I have learned over the years, that the most important part of the meeting is often the time spent getting to connect and know one another.
Like me, many people struggle with making the time to connect with other people.
Here are some strategies I try when my mind is a blank:
1. Ask about a neutral event. What are your plans for the weekend? How was your weekend? We have been looking for a new place to eat, do you have a favorite place for dinner?
2. Ask open questions. Comment on the weather and ask about their favorite season. Mention a movie you saw and lead into what movies they have seen, loved, want to see.
3. Comment on a topic both of you are experiencing. An event, the food, the occasion, the weather, their outfit, etc.
4. Comment on a recent event. Keep it politically and religiously neutral. Ask their opinion. You may not want to share your opinion if it is extreme.
5. Ask a hobby based question.: “What internet sites do you visit regularly?” “What vacation spot would you recommend?” Use a lead in.. This weekend, we went canoeing.. Do you like the outdoors? What do you do when you aren’t working?
7. Most Importantly: Respond to what a person says. Just pick up on what they said and ask another question. Or respond with interest and share a story. The best conversations feel like an easy ping pong match. We bat the ball over the net in a friendly manner and enjoy just being human for a few minutes. Once we know a bit about one another about our human-ness, we pick up and do some great work together.
Did you find this article insightful? Please share! And check out our many products and services focused on business and career development!